The Hazards of a Travelling Female!

MEN

Yes you saw it correctly, my first hazard to avoid at all costs on my ajala runs is men. I'll explain with the story below. I was 'jejeli' minding my business when one man decided to disturb me, I was waiting in the lobby of the hotel waiting for the driver who was checking out the car we were to travel in when he walked in. I was clearly in no mood to talk and certainly not to him. After exchanging greetings he introduced himself and I pointedly ignored him, after waiting a few seconds he repeated his name as if to reassure himself that I was not deaf.

I told him my name and he then proceeded to give me a lecture on the evils of foreign aid in badly constructed local dialect flavoured english. In my mind I wished I was anywhere else but there. After his lecture which I punctuated with nods of my head so as not to seem impolite he proceeded to ask me where I was travelling to, he then proceeded to try and wheedle out an invitation to visit me that day in town which was well over two hours from where we were. I at first did not realise why he was asking me all those questions for in matters like that I'm more naive than cunning. After realising where he was going I told him point blank that he could not visit me. How can you just meet me and decide that you want to come and visit me haba! He really was jobless.

There are other men who see you on your own and decide that you are the fish in the pond who must be caught in whatever net they dangle. It just amazes me that men who should have better things to do spend their time hanging out and looking for women to boost their ego on their one day away from home.I really would like to give these jobless men the talking to of their lives but as I de I no get their time.

FOOD POISONING

Hmm this is a tough one to avoid as man must wack. I remember my first time travelling long distance, I was still at the university and I made the unfortunate mistake of accepting yoghurt from a friend who had bought it from some roadside hawker. This was somewhere in Bauchi, by the time I reached Jos I was in obvious distress and the toilet on board it was a luxurious bus was only for minor jobs:)

Anyway we got to some town in Jos and luckily for me our bus had a few problems on the way so we stopped. I got to some houses and asked for a toilet, they all pointed me to the direction of some shrubs, no toilet I asked again, they all said no. Hmm this young lady had never stooped to do any such thing Little Miss Tush that I was, I put my nose in the air and walked back to the bus with all my dignity intact or so I thought.

A few minutes after we set off again my stomach made it clear that I did the wrong thing by not using the poor peoples 'toilets', pressure like that of an alaburu weighed down by 5bags of rice was exerted mercilessly on my poor innards, I thought I was going to die, sweat poured profusely down my head and I developed symptoms resembling a state of shock. My fellow travellers empathised with me, the driver was not going to stop for anything!

To cut a very long story short we got to Abuja after about three hours and our vehicle once again developed a problem with the fan belt, so we stopped again. By this time I did not sneer at the only toilet offered, I gratefully emptied my bowels in natures toilet. By the time I was through I was severely dehydrated but that did not tempt me to open my mouth to swallow anything thought the journey lasted more than 24hours all told with the problems with the bus. As for yoghurt or any food hawked on the road, even if I get it for free I do not eat! One experience made me extremely wise in that respect.

To be continued.....